Well, it has been a busy two weeks. When last I left you, we were celebrating the favored holiday of Keitholicism, Ass Wednesday. I got to celebrate in a different way at work. A homeless man slipped past the gate guards here on base. We happen to be the closest building to the front gate, so he walked up to our visitor's entrance. He rang the bell and got buzzed in, but didn't wait very long at the visitor's desk before he set off exploring. The receptionist ran into my office and told me we had an unauthorized visitor running loose in the building. I tracked him down into an empty cubicle where he was helping himself to trash bags, and if I hadn't gotten there in time, likely some pilfer-able equipment. I managed to get him out of the building, after he frightened some people and strained some work relationships (more on that later).
By the time we got outside, he wasn't very happy with me. The police arrived quickly, and took custody of the dude. When they searched him, imagine my surprise to learn that he had six knives on him. I honestly don't think he was there to hurt anybody. I think he was going to take whatever he could quickly get his hands on, and get out. However, that doesn't prevent me from recounting the tale of how I single-handedly faced down a crazed-psychotic bristling with weaponry. This would have never happened, if my Delores was still here!
During the festivities, the homeless dude managed to get into a suite of four offices with an outer office area where the secretary sits. At the time he got in there, he was fleeing from me, and people in that area knew this wasn't a good thing. One of the managers, a fellow who portrays himself as an outdoorsy Marlboro man, ran into his office and slammed the door, leaving the secretary trapped in the outer office with the stranger, after making eye-contact with the poor woman. One of the other managers in that suite came out of his office and shoved the secretary through his door and closed it.
Needless to say, the secretary and this manager are not quite getting along at the moment. The guy is taking a ration of good-natured, and some maybe not good-natured, ribbing about his less than heroic behavior. In fact, the guy has taken off a good bit since the incident. You really don't know what you'd do in one of those situations, but I guess he found out.
I'm satisfied to know that I went toward the trouble. Which, of course, verifies my status as the Alpha Male, the stallion, the silverback, the top dog, the male lion; "King Kong ain't got nothin' on me!" However, if I'd have known he had all those knives, I'd have been heroically weeping under a desk, with a big snot bubble coming out of my nose.
fearlessness is ridiculously sexy. it says "i simply don't give a shit anymore and am willing to die for just about any reason...".
you, sir, are a stud. with or without a snotbubble.
Posted by: daisyfae | March 04, 2010 at 05:30 PM
my hero... xoxo
Posted by: suicide_blond | March 05, 2010 at 03:16 PM
Way to go Keith. Let me pass you a suction tube for that snotbubble and we'll go out for a celebratory drink
Posted by: nursemyra | March 05, 2010 at 05:50 PM
After the tales from your youth, I highly doubt the snotbubble scenario would ever occur, UK.
Posted by: Rob | March 06, 2010 at 11:54 AM
hey pal, sounds like its time to start packin some hardware at the office...
Posted by: beaverboosh | March 12, 2010 at 03:32 PM